About me…hmmm. I never know exactly what to write on this type of page. I am infinitely more comfortable writing about topics in my life than I am writing about me persay. However, I do read that a properly written “About Me” page can generate interest in people actually reading my blog so I’ll give it whirl.

If you were to ask me about myself even a year ago, I would have an entirely different answer than I do now. I am re-learning how to accept and love myself at the core. I am my own worst critic and have taken that out on myself in a variety of ways over the years. In my younger years, I was the quintessential girl that rarely misstepped or did anything wrong. I was the girl that other friend’s parents wanted their child to hang out with so that perhaps my good behavior and lack of angst would somehow rub off on them. I was the girl who wasn’t wealthy but had enough to always fit in with the “it crowd.” I was cute, blond, thin with curves and provably intelligent with a wide range of other talents to top off the resume.

Then I met him and my life unraveled from there. Him refers to my now ex-husband. The not-so-bad guy that was simply the WRONG person for me from Day 1. However, I was 16 and in love. Starting with constantly fearing he’d try to commit suicide, from dealing with his wretched family, to continuing to pursue him after serious mistakes on his part, I began years of self-abusive behavior that resulted in a life-threatening eating disorder.

I often ask myself how I let myself get so entrenched into someone that was so obviously (now anyway) completely and utterly toxic? How I abused myself over this person? How I BLAMED myself for not only my faults but his as well?

The past 3 years have been a journey of rediscovering myself and who I am. It has been a journey of overcoming a deadly coping mechanism. A journey of self-forgiveness for heiness mistakes I made, poor judgment, simply acting off my rocker and hurting people during a time of, what I can only describe as, madness. A journey of reawakening my spirituality. A journey of discovering new gifts and a freedom in accepting myself.

So there’s a little bit about me. I am a woman of many labels. Some of them bad, some of them good, some of them yet to be decided. Most of my posts will revolve around my new roles as an ex-wife, 2nd wife, mother and step-mother and topics such as divorce, remarriage, dealing with exes, dealing with stepchildren, parenting, eating disorders, depression, faith and spirituality and any other relevant topic to my life as it is. It is my place to rant, blather, slam, praise and simply muddle through this thing called my life.

Agree or disagree with my posts…whatever. I am a flawed human seeking the greater truths and trudging down my own path of self-forgiveness.